Assignment 4-1

              For many others and myself the detail that stands out the most is the picture of the man who is falling.  The man seemed to be very calm and at peace with what is happening to him.  For me it seems like he might be thinking as long as I am dying, might as well go with it and do something interesting.  If I were in his place my body would definitely not be that composed.  My body would be contorted, I would be panicked and I would be trying to slow down some how or trying to do something.  I would not be as calm as that man and I would be trying to get my head up so I wouldn’t be looking at the spot where I am going to die in a very short amount of time.

            A pattern of repetition and contrast is that every paragraph that Junod writes is a completely different topic but they all conclude with the falling man and who exactly is this man.  A detail that does not fit the pattern is that the paragraphs do not seem to flow.  To me the paragraphs seem to be in somewhat of a random order and hard to follow along with all the information.  Also it seems like the paragraphs do not contain any transitional words or any transitional paragraphs that would make reading this article a little bit easier.

Assignment 3-5

           While I was witting about Neufeld’s comic, “A.D. New Orleans After the Deluge”, I focused on my introduction paragraph the most because what I wrote in the first paragraph will shape the rest of my essay.  The conclusion was the last paragraph I wrote and the one that took the least time because it is just restating and rewording my introduction paragraph.  The easiest paragraph for me to write was the second one talking about violence because I had more examples and evidence to support it. The feedback that I received regarding my essay was positive and the comments that I got are really going to help me in improving my work.  Professor Sullivan mentioned on she really likes how I” have the strategy of contrast identified alongside an implication of what’s at stake for the audience in reading this comic”.  My peer reviewer also stated that my first sentence was great which is really good because have I troubles in trying to decide what my first sentence should be and is something I worry about. 

            While revising I would like to add a paragraph talking about the death that was shown in the comic and how that could affect the audience.  I would also like to add more summary to my comic by adding to my introduction paragraph the who, what, when, where aspects of the comic. The concerns that I still have about my essay is mentioning why Neufeld shows what he does in the comic and what is the reason behind them.  Another concern is adding more information and examples into my essay.

Assignment 3-4

After reviewing my essay, I believe I need to work on my thesis and introduction paragraph so more.  I am not sure that it is not clear enough and/or easily understandable and might seem confusing to those who are not familiar with the topic.  Also in my later paragraphs I think that it might need some more examples and/or quotes from the text and go into more depth with what I am talking about.  Another thing that might need some more work is making sure that my paragraphs flow together and that the transitions are clear and make sense.

Assignment 3-2

Working Thesis: Neufeld shows the readers examples of people who are caring and contrasts them with people who are angry with the only way of coping is through violence and shows weakness in others through his work in "A.D. New Orleans After the Deluge".

Statement of Purpose: My readers are my fellow classmates and my course instructor.  My readers are familiar with the topic having read the material as well.  What my readers do not know is how I perceive the material to be.  I believe my readers will accept my writing with some discussions to go along with it.  After reading my work I hope they will view my writing in a positive way and know exactly where my evidence is coming from.  Also when my readers finish I would like them to think I understand where Neufeld is coming from and that I understand his point of view as well.  I would like my readers to feel that my work is important.  I also want my work to get my readers thinking about how their views changed on the material after reading my work.  I am not sure about how my audience's emotions are going to shift, are they going to feel angry about my work, are they going to enjoy reading my work, or are they going to feel neutral when it comes to my writing?  I just hope that they feel informed on how I feel about the material for myself.

Assignment 3-1

    While reading "A.D. New Orleans After the Deluge" I noticed three details that were revealing and significant for me, a binary and an anomaly.
   The first revealing detail for me was that the text contained moments of violence.  When reading a comic I automatically think comedy and not something that contains violence.  Also on a few panels I noticed that they contained guns, whether people were directly showing them or if they were simply there in the background.  Another revealing details was that one panel showed death, which once again something I would not expect in a comic.  Also in the next panel, a text box had a little girl questioning her mom if that person was sleeping when in fact she was dead.  This could also bring up the fact that now at some point she has to explain death to her daughter too soon.  A significant detail was that it showed a culture that maybe some people wouldn't be comfortable with seeing.  Many people don't want to think about the people that need help because it might make them feel uncomfortable that they have a home and everything they want, while these people in text just had everything of their's wiped out.
    The binary that stood out to me was that in one panel showed that people went and raided a rite aid store but then made sure that the older people were taken care of first.  This shows that a person can do the wrong thing but still be caring.  It was wrong to steal those things even though they were desperately needed but none the less they took care of the people that needed more than worried about themselves instead of keeping the items to themselves and wouldn't even think about sharing with others.
    The anomaly that stood out to me was the desperation that was in most panels.  People were desperate to leave where they were basically trapped, desperate for the buses to come that never did and desperate for water and these may have lead them to do things that they would never would of thought to do before.  Maybe a person would not think of stealing but when you need to in order to take care of your family it could lead one to panic and lead to drastic measures.  Also one may not use violence but when everyone is cranky, upset, or even depressed and people are not getting along it may cause someone to easily snap and threaten to solve the problems with different means of violence.

Assignment 2-5

    From reading another student's essay, I learned how to analyze someone's work properly.  From the student's essay I remember a statement that O could of used in my own which is, "that people once understood the importance of organic foods.  The inclusion of ideas from other classmates work helps bind relationships by seeing the others point of view on the subject matter and when reviewing your work, they are not trying to attack your work but trying to make your work better.

    When my classmate positively responded to my essay, it motivated me not to worry so much when I am writing and not feel afraid to write what I think.  I believe that I was successful at accomplishing my purpose in assignment 2-2.

    From the conference I learned that along with what the author states, I have to also write the reasons why behind it.  After the conference I no longer have any questions.

    My three most important revisions are my citation, editing a paragraph, and editing my thesis.  My citation needs to be edited into the proper format.  I have to edit a paragraph that is slightly confusing and a little bit wordy.  Lastly I have to change my thesis to make it more direct and I learned that I can do this effectively in two sentences.