Thesis Statement:
In ‘Back to the Land’ Kalman’s goal is to sway people who live in cities or in a fast paced environment to stop eating fast foods, slow down and take the time to eat more healthy and organic foods, through her choice of words and strong photographs.
Statement of Purpose:
My readers are my classmates and my course instructor. They are familiar with the piece that I am reflecting on having read it themselves. With that said, I will have to make sure that I point ideas out that they may not of noticed and not being too repetitive of what Kalman's text is about. When done reading, I hope they understand how I view Kalman’s work to be. They do not have to agree or disagree with my point of view, but I would like them to respect my perspective on the subject matter and to take my writing seriously. One last thing when my readers are done with my piece, I would like them to think that I know and understand what I am writing about and everything is clear to them and if there are questions about it, they can easily be answered.Also I hope my readers will have a positive response towards my writing and care about what I have to say. I would also like my readers having to think about the points I bring up in my writing, because what is the point of writing if it does not get people to think and reflect on it.
Carly, your thesis statement mentions the specific aspects of "Back to the Land" that you will be analyzing (or hope to be analyzing -- I know you haven't written the paper yet!). I think that's a really good choice because your readers will immediately have an idea of what direction you're taking in the essay. Also, when you mention that Kalman is trying to sway readers, this gives you an opportunity to pose a debatable claim and discuss Kalman's readers, giving evidence for why you see these people as the targeted readership.
ReplyDeleteYour point about avoiding too much repetition is well-taken. I have a feeling that repetitive statements would be easy to fall into, since "Back to the Land" actually addresses so many similar issues in many similar stories/examples. I think if you focus on HOW Kalman has created her text (i.e. analyze her composing strategies) and focus less on her topic (i.e. nutrition etc.), that will help you.
Right now, as I read your working thesis, I am predicting you'll need to revise it as you go along in your draft. The specific mention of word choices and photos might be a little too specific and too limiting in what you feel free to talk about. Definitely remember that this working thesis statement is open to change as you follow your ideas through your draft. Just stay focused on that controlling purpose you wrote.
As for ideas about evidence, I immediately think of an organizing contrast between photos of the city (which for Kalman means fastness) and photos of the country or wide-open landscape in California (which might represent slowness for Kalman). For example, the picture of the tree followed by the picture of the cow. These pictures are huge, and the sky is so blue and gigantic. Also, fastness and slowness is just one contrast we could pull from the city/country binary. For example, when I compare the picture of the “cockamamie contraption” on page 112 with the photo of gray/black cars in a gray parking lot on page 121, I see a lot of differences, and not just fast/slow differences. Also, the city landscape with brick buildings on page 121 looks different from the diverse landscape of Bob Cannard’s farm on page 98. Is Kalman implying a downside of standardized urban life, i.e. uniformity and a lack of personal expression? Does the idea of creativity play into Kalman’s argument at all, and how does it connect with the extensive discussion of food? Just some things to think about!
Looking forward to reading your draft.